Category Archives: Scions of the Moon

Growing Girls

03 Tuesday Apr 2012

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I continue to read Kress and I am happy to report it is making a difference as I consider my characters from various vantage points of motivation, emotion and inner conflict. The Scion girls are changing and beginning to take on more rounded shapes. They are trying on new clothes to see if they fit, are good enough for alterations or should be discarded. This is pleasing to me as the more “real” and curvy they become, the easier it is to write about them walking, talking and interacting with each other and the environment.

The more this process continues, the more convinced I am that a major, if not radical, rewrite of the entire storyline is a good idea. Though I will keep many of the major landmarks, I can tell the plot is drifting away from my intended Propp-esque outline. I still want it to be recognizable by those familiar with his work, but I am beginning to wonder if his ideas were not hemming in my own. Indeed, this may have been a problem all along and not just in relation to Propp and my plot. I had intended to write up these characters based on three online friends. I think I may have been overly concerned with whether or not the Scion girls were recognizable to my three friends. Thus, instead of letting them develop, ripen and mature into who or what my muse wanted them to be, I was subconsciously holding them back to keep them purposely familiar.

Presently I’m in chapter four and working on a “Emotional Mini-Bio” for each of them. It is one of those things more experienced writers do without prompting. I however, need to follow this more formal approach it seems and put these characters at least through their paces. As hinted above, it is helping. In the meantime, in another dark corner of my mind, additional plot ideas and adjustments have been simmering, changes and edits based on my discoveries.

It is my hope to digest Kress’ suggestions and use them more intuitively with my next set of characters of which there are not a few hammering at the gates, as it were, clamoring for admission and due process. Sorry folks, one set of zombies at a time.

Time…sigh.

My world is indeed crowded, both the world of my imagination and the physical world. School is on the downhill slope. Both my charges and I are looking forward to May 31st with great anticipation. Presently Prom preparations, senior-itis and Benchmarks/STAR/Exit exams are primary concerns. On the home front an approaching set of solo piping competitions at the end of the month are forefront in my mind and the limited time I have after school is devoted to practice and trying to get a “…good going pipe” ready for the contests (I’ll keep my piping comments to a minimum and expand on them in my piping blog). My Lady’s third stop smoking attempt in the last ten years continues apace and I’m happy to say, so far so good. I am bursting with pride and admiration for her whole hearted decision and determined follow through. She is, and always will be, my inspiration. It does, however make for some tense moments and cranky days, but I could careless as long as she is happy.

My own attempts at life changing also continues as my diet adjusts for the better and…other things…begin to find their place. Time however, and as ever, is at a premium: writing in the morning; school during the day; piping in the afternoon; family—when our schedules coincide—in the evening; catch up on the weekends. Spring break starts Friday. I look forward to more family time, as well as time to both write and pipe…it would be nice to do some woodworking too and go for a bike ride or two.

Mountaineering the ‘Craftians’

29 Thursday Mar 2012

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Rocky terrain. Uphill going. Steeply inclined. Freezing. Snow drifts. A writer climbs the mountains.

Though I’d been writing in one form or another since I could; though I teach fiction and academic writing; though I have been an avid reader of contemporary and classic lit, I knew I had a lot to learn when it came to writing fiction. Just as many erroneously assume if one can speak a language, one can teach it, so too with writing fiction. Simply because one has the creative urge to write does not assume they can write interesting and create well composed fiction. It’s a craft—talent and natural ability notwithstanding—that must be learned, honed and challenged with “…careful practice during a severe course of training…” Isolated writers ploughing along, accumulating huge word counts in the wee hours of the morning or dark silences of the night easy forget how difficult it can be to do what they do well when overshadowed and wowed by such mountainous output.

On a NaNo forum I asked about what books the writers there had found helpful in developing craft. It was really surprising to me how many relied exclusively on learning by “…reading other writer’s fiction…” I agree and acknowledge that this as a wonderful source, one I utilize myself. I can’t help but wonder however, if that isn’t enough. Books and classes on writing my seem extemporaneous, but I am coming to appreciate more and more how much I don’t know as I read where other writers have sojourned before me and the elevated view they discovered there that I was unaware of—things that would have been obtuse or downright illusive were I to rely exclusively on gleaning from another writer’s fiction alone. Maybe it is just me, my learning modality, how I work best and my self-image that’s at play here, but…wow…this shit is hard to do right.

As I read my work I see more clearly how it’s such a pile of words and has very little to do with craft, but is more of a semi-creative vomit. For many that’s as far as it goes. Behold my mountain!

As I continue to read Kress’s book on character, emotion and point of view, in the back of my mind I am climbing with the girls from Scions. As I subject them to the exercises suggested at the end of each chapter—not all the exercises just those that seem applicable—it is becoming more and more evident that they lack something and that this ‘something’ is what is keeping me from composing about them as freely as I did the characters from The Kevodran.

I’m not entirely sure yet, but I have a growing suspicion it has to do with conflict. It’s not that there is no conflict, mind you, they’ve got plenty to deal with, but it may not be the right kind of conflict between the right characters, it may be too ‘outward,’ inter-conflict between themselves and others rather than intra-conflict within their relationship with each other. Even though I’ve given the girls divergent backgrounds, and skill sets, they still have too much in common having been raised together in a monastery for the past half dozen years. This commonality is for me, part of the “Screen of Reality” through which the girls perceive and react to the world around them and each other. I have a feeling the mesh is too fine, too uniform, too similar and, as a result, the girls are not reacting as individuals but as parrots of each other. I suspect these girls need private agendas. I suspect I may have to end up ‘breaking up’ their friendship in order to make them more interesting and appealing to a reader, as well as to my imagination. I may need to include the deeper underlying challenge of getting over themselves, setting aside petty behavior and learning to work together so that they might complete the overriding challenge in an interesting fashion.

This could mean a major rewrite, a climb back down the mountain, a resupply and a brand new attempt along a different route. While this may not necessarily negate the 60,000 words thus written, as it is arguable they were necessary to formulating a better plan, and though I would use material from them, a new beginning, a uniquely different beginning is in order.

Sigh.

Nothing is sure yet. I still have more than half the book to go. These are simply my thoughts at present. Now, back to my pitons and ropes.

At A Crossroads

20 Tuesday Mar 2012

Posted by in Observation, Reading, Scions of the Moon, The Kevodran, Writing

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Every now and then I have to remind myself that even though I greatly desire to be published, I really write because I must. I would write no matter what–in my journal, here or my other blogs or one of my manuscripts; I am, in that sense, a writer. Reminding myself of that takes the edge off the paralyzing anxiousness. The dynamic tension, on the other hand, that’s something I don’t want to put to sleep. The dividing line between the two states is razor’s thin and allowing myself to reach the edge is perilous indeed. Case in point, dynamic tension has been nodding off for some time now.

I have ‘chilled’ on my manuscripts, in despair trying to distance myself from the dilemma of which to throw myself at, like taking a nap before re-attacking a knotty problem. I need to give myself over to one of them however. I need dynamic tension to replace anxiousness. I sense I am at a crossroads and about to make a wholehearted choice. Regardless, I need to stop thinking about it and act.

Scions of the Moon as ever baulked at my entreaties and only released her secrets in reluctant flexing spasms like a choking car. There is something wrong, something in the way. I think it has to do with POV. I have three main characters and just can’t get my mind around how to handle their point-of-views. They are close (same gender and age); they come from similar experiences (abandoned in one form or another…without family); have been raised under nearly identical circumstances (monastery); encountered the same problem (the kidnap of their friend and no one to believe them); and have to face the same fear (leaving the monastery… to go ‘out-there’ for the sake of their friend).

While in the monastery, it didn’t see too much of a problem, but now they stand before the wall ready to climb over it and I’m holding them back because I don’t feel confident enough to portray their experience convincingly–or interestingly–enough.

I have my magic system developed enough that I’m comfortable with sending them over and writing about any arcane encounters they may have, but I think I will do one more thing before I definitively decide to pursue their adventure. In the back of my mind, I’m wondering if I should create a fourth character from which to tell the tale and have the presently three mains act as helpers and guides rather than stars of the show. Or maybe tell the tale from the perspective of the kidnapped friend or some other character who would be privy to the story but as a storyteller not directly part of the action. The former sounds more right than the latter. Sigh…maybe I need to grow and develop a little more as a writer before tackling multiple POVs.

Anyway, as a final meditation, I’m going to read Nancy Kress’s Characters, Emotion and Viewpoint in an effort to gain some perspective on and insights into multiple view points. As with all such books, writing ideas float up from the back of my mind as I read. I’ll keep track of them with notes and upon finishing–it’s only a little more than 200 pages–I’ll commit to a road. Should I choose The Kevodran road rather than the Scion track, the time spent with the “Wise Guide” will not be wasted as I’m sure there will be nuggets of wisdom therein panned that I can apply to Efrahm, Selt and Orrja’s story as well.

Am I simply avoiding commitment and, by extension, responsibility? I don’t know. It’s possible, but any plan is better than sitting on my hands enviously reading about another 16-year old prodigy producing copious amounts of YA re-run dubiousness (not bitter at all there are we?). Good, bad or indifferent, I need to forge ahead with my own dubiousness, and if for no one else then at least for me.

I Was Warned

21 Saturday Jan 2012

Posted by in NaNoWriMo, Observation, Retrospection, Scions of the Moon, The Kevodran, Writing

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Realizing a truth is so much more potent than simply understanding it. ~Tshamis DurUlekin, Master of the Purple Tower

I was warned and thought I believed the warning. From my present perspective however, I have to admit that deep down in my muddy subconscious, I must have thought I was an exception. I must have…because I find I am in the very place I was warned I would end up if I did.

I cheated on my main manuscript and now, she and the manuscript I was seduced by have both left me.

Yes, I, who have suffered the pain of adultery in real life, subjected my manuscript to the same disrespect and hurt. The odd thing is, I wasn’t lured away by a, “Sexy next book.” My siren was the NaNoWriMo project. The rules of the project require starting a new manuscript, but starting a new manuscript while I was still involved with the old one was exactly what Heather Sellers warned not to do in chapter 20 “Sexy Next Book” of Chapter After Chapter.

Oh, I thought I had it all worked out. The Kevodron would be primary manuscript and Scions would be the work I had waiting in the wings. When The Kevodran was finished, I’d pickup where I’d left off with Scions. It would then be the primary manuscript. Then, at the next NaNo, while still working on Scions, I’d take a break, work up something new as a secondary project and then return to Scions when the NaNo was over and finish it off. It was such a pretty plan.

What is odd is I was not all that enamored with Scions of the Moon, my NaNo project, in the first place so I was constantly thinking about The Kevodran, my first love, even while dallying with Scions. A whole load o’guilt, oh yes.

When the month ended, I stopped writing on Scions nearly immediately, but when I turned back to The Kevodran, she had turned away from me. She was, and still is, pissed off and holding me at arms length. I can’t say I blame her, I mean damn, who wouldn’t?

Surfacing from the metaphor, I’m  suffering from the “Creep”—just as Heather warned I would. Because I wasn’t fully committed to one idea, I had ceased to think about it, keep it in the forefront of my mind, meditating on the characters and plot, viewing all life through the lens of its reality. As a consequence, it has crept away. I opened up The Kevodran and it felt like I was suddenly looking up a very tall, very steep and rugged mountainside that I had to ascend to get back on top.

“So far,” I thought and I was instantly and totally drained of energy and I hadn’t even fingered a key.

I closed the document.

Thus, I haven’t written anything substantial or added anything to either of the manuscripts since the end of November, ’11. The end of semester, the holidays and HOL homework has demanded a significant portion of my attention, it is true, but the fact remains I have not returned to my 04:00 writing practice. I get up at that time, don’t get me wrong, but I’m not working on either manuscript. The truth is The Kevodran has crept away from me, hurt and disrespected and now, Scions, being left suddenly alone, has done the same and here I am once again writing about writing.   Sigh.

I should have listened to Heather. I bloody well knew better! I should have taken Brandon Sanderson’s advice and done the NaNo as I know I should have—namely writing from Orja’s point-of-view—because that’s where I was, that’s where the fire was burning. Screw starting a new manuscript. One writer: one manuscript to the bitter end, baby.

Now that I realize my mistake, what do I do?

Obviously I need to make peace with one of the two manuscripts, reacquaint myself with its information, re-immerse myself into its mental reality—essentially, spend the time needed to get back into her good graces, long and arduous though it might be, and remain faithful to the end.

Post script:

This situation begs the question, once again, concerning the nature of the writer’s life and how I am living it. I’m not going to revisit all the demands on my time like some jilted lover re-hashing with his friends, over and over again what happened as he works it out. I put myself on notice, once again however, that unless I can find a rhythm, a writing practice that I can consistently maintain, then all my efforts are wasted. A dreadful thought with sobering consequences.

Originally posted in The Salamander’s Quill 1.0 now deleted.

December 1, 2011: The Day After

02 Friday Dec 2011

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Done. According to the NaNoWriMo validator: 50,047. According to Scrivener and MS Word: 50,449. Regardless of the number, it’s over 50k and that is the important thing.

There were a lot of professional, personal and interest oriented obligations in November. There were professional academic requirements that needed tending including teaching and tutoring. Thank the gods, two of those professional obligations, Rock-a-thon and Assessment evaluations, were canceled. There were family obligations of significant proportions that occurred including the advent of a second grandchild, Samantha Xenos, travel to Hollywood to watch my wife receive two music awards and hosting the family Thanksgiving celebration. I was able to maintain those responsibilities and still get my 50k done.

It was in the interest department that things did not work out as hoped. Though I was able to maintain my bagpipe practice and lesson schedule, I totally dropped the ball on HOL and Gryffindor prefect duties. I’m probably going to lose serious standing in that online community. I just could not do the 50k and get all the homework in. If I had been smart, I would have made arrangements to be gone and hand in my homework late. As it is, I have not been on site or in the Gryffindor Common Room for over a month. Not good.

So, were I to analyze the success of this NaNoWriMo experiment in light of the above, I would rate it neither a complete failure nor an unqualified success. It’s obvious I cannot maintain such an intense combination of writing schedule, academic career, family obligations and personal interest responsibility.  On the other hand, I did prove I could tackle such a large project in the midst of those things and complete it. I just wish I could have kept up on HOL too.

What’s next? Good question. Do I soldier on and finish the first draft of Scions of the Moon or do I return to The Kevodron and complete that manuscript by adding the second POV? I have to admit to a certain feeling of obligation to those who contributed to my sponsorship page, three dear HOL friends and a partner-in-creative-crime from the OHS art department who has been particularly encouraging to finish Scions to a point they can read it. I have to admit I am leaning heavily that way. I just don’t know. I’m afraid of getting so far away from The Kevodran that I don’t want to go back…or creatively cannot.

There are also a couple of short blog entry essay ideas floating around in my head that I would like to give air to, one involving an idea about the limited use of the word “love,” and another about the role of the Mentor from Campbell’s Hero’s Journey I play here at school. I suppose those would be short and sweet and could be done regardless of what I’m working on manuscript-wise.

I suppose I’d also like to finish Sanderson’s Well of Ascension too…and Vogler’s The Writer’s Journey. Regardless I need to go to HOL and see what I can salvage of my reputation and house points, get what homework I can done and turned in and talk to Jenny and Kadina.

Were it not for that disappointment and guilt, I would have to say I am seriously happy I made the 50k. I did the NaNoWriMo! I got into it, raised money for the cause, worked hard, wrote my fingers to the bone and now have a second Earinna’arin manuscript to work on. All in all, not too shabby.

Originally posted in The Salamander’s Quill 1.0 now deleted.

Why Do It At All?

08 Tuesday Nov 2011

Posted by in NaNoWriMo, Scions of the Moon, Writing

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Sunday was not as productive as I would have liked. To tell the truth, neither day this weekend was particularly mile consuming or memorable. Though I completed a few things, wrote not a few word, it was not enough. I hunger for me.

I d/l-ed a program, Freedom, that helps me control my wild spur-of-the-moment and guild less internet forays that eat up so much time…

I wrote a couple thousand words…

I received my end-of-the-NaNo reward from Amazon. The book, Harry Potter: Page to Screen: The Complete Film Making Journey, sits on my drum table still wrapped in cellophane awaiting my success…

I caught up on my blogging transferring journal notes to the internet, for what I am not sure…

I read part of the Dec/Nov edition of Poets & Writers…

I wrote to some of my Writing Buddies and added a new one…

I changed my mind and decided not to attend a local Write-In on Sunday…

I researched personality types and zodiac sign profiles for Scions of the Moon characters…

I learned how to more confidently navigate Scrivener…

I cooked a crock pot full of split-pea and ham…

I changed my clock…

…basically, I did far, far too much and definitely not enough…not even close.

I am discouraged.

Why write at all?

“All these truths and quasi-truths…about publishing are finally ephemeral…. What is demanding and fulfilling is writing a single word, trying to write le mot juste, as Flaubert said; writing several of them, which become a sentence. When a writer does that, day after day, working alone with little encouragement, often with discouragement flowing in the writer’s own blood, and with an occasional rush of excitement…the treasure is on the desk. If the manuscript itself, mailed out to the world, where other truths prevail, is never published, the writer will suffer bitterness, sorrow, anger and more dangerously, despair…. But the writer who endures and keeps working will finally know that writing the book is something hard and glorious, for at the desk a writer must try to be free of prejudice, meanness of spirit, pettiness, and hatred; strive to be a better human being than the writer normally is, and to do this through concentration on a single word, and then another, and another. This is splendid work, as worthy and demanding as any, and the will and resilience to do it are good for the writer’s soul. –Andre Durbus, “First Books”

Ohhhh…I just need a goodnight’s sleep 😛

Originally posted in The Salamander’s Quill 1.0 now deleted.

Freedom!

05 Saturday Nov 2011

Posted by in NaNoWriMo, Scions of the Moon, Writing

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Earlier this month I was reading my latest copy of “Poets & Writers” magazine and came across an article by Ellen Sussman in The Literary Life department entitled “A Writer’s Daily Habit: Four Steps To Higher Productivity” wherein she gives some very good advice about prewriting prep, blocking the internet, the unit system and daily writing. She mentioned a program called “Freedom” that blocks the internet for a certain amount of time as directed.

During the week, I rise at 04:00 to write for at least an hour and a half, usually cutting myself off sometime before 06:00, so I can make it to work on time. It’s the weekend however, and I cut myself some slack. I answer email, send a few notes to NaNo buddies, watch a video or two, check out the various forums I read, make an entry to two, visit a blog or five, make a comment on Ravven’s (only her’s…I at least have that much discipline) and lazily make a stab or two at my manuscript. What I tell myself is, “I have all day…” but the next thing I know “all day” is gone and my productivity summarily sucks major.

Reading some of my writing buddys’ comments and blogs about procrastination, etc. I was reminded of this program, so I looked it up, read about it, then purchased and d/l-ed it. One: was able to use my preferred payment method, nice. Two: easy d/l. Three: easy install. Four: easy to use. Five: it frackin’ works! I typed in 30 minutes on the interface and I was shut out of the internet for 30 minutes: no explorer, no mail, no nada. What to do, what to do? Write! Clickity, clickity, clack!

At the end of 30 minutes a small window popped up: “Close, Tweet Stats, Restart Freedom.” Of course I chose to close and get back on the internet to see if the world had changed. Kinda reminded me of being a kid and re-checking the ‘fridge or pantry every 15 minutes to see if the food-faeries had brought anything since I last looked.

Now some who have a bit more discipline than myself might say, well, why not just unplug the internet and save some money? Well that would be because I can just as easily plug it back in—did I mention having a problem resisting the ‘net’s siren call? As the program sets it up, I would have to shut down and reboot to circumvent the program. Now that’s just a pain in the ass.

At $10.00, the product was reasonable and it did what it said it would. There was a survey that hinted at future version features which would be cool: a timer so the program kicked in at a certain time (talk about setting a schedule for going to bed), a filter that would allow users to listen to music sites (think Pandora, Rivendell and Iceberg radio) and filter that would enable one to access up to three websites (a dangerous proposition I think—I would not like that one) and a few others.

I have a feeling this program and I are going to be good buddies, particularly during the NaNoWriMo but also beyond and for other reasons than writing. An additional program was advertised on the Freedom site that analyzed and charted how and where one spends their time when on the ‘net. I’m not yet brave enough to look at a pie chart of how much of my life I’ve devoted to the machine-god, so I didn’t explore that option, but if Freedom upgrades include a time setting feature…

Not that it really matters to any one in particular, but I give it four and a half stars—as soon as they feature an upgrade wherein I can listen to my beloved internet radio, I’ll give it five.

Originally posted in The Salamander’s Quill 1.0 now deleted.