It is something; it is nothing; it is everything. There will be no place for it save in my cyber scrap book. It will never be framed and placed on the wall next to my degrees or credential, but, nonetheless, as whimsical as it is, as easily “forged” as it could be, I will not be able to look at it without associating some deeply cherished hopes and very real blood-sweat-and-tears with the effort it represents. It is more than a 50k+ attaboy. It represents passing a test: can I write a novel-length manuscript; can I do this thing that I have talked about doing nearly all my life? No certificate would have meant, “not this time” or maybe not ever. The parameters were self-imposed but no less stringent than those placed on a creative writing major working toward an MA. From that perspective, the whimsical blue and white certificate may therefore mean more personally than my college degree, for in this instance no professor, no curriculum, no colloquium could have been as demanding, exacting and critical as I myself was.

The August NoWriMo effort then represents a different test and, if passed, achievement. Can I write, with a running start of two final weeks of vacation, 50k+ of a manuscript while resuming work at the same time? In addition, can I actually finish a manuscript (the first draft of The Kevodran should be finished within the next 20 to 25k words)? Knowing my vocation as I do, this will be very difficult. Ironically, there is no sympathy for a secret life of letters even in an English department. Your total devotion is expected; your total sacrifice presupposed. Even as I am in the first movements of that trial, it is proving problematic and I find I am having to refine my “butt-in-chair” or “eyes-on-the-manuscript” skills as the aegis of July’s success lulls my focus.

The National NoWriMo in November is what might be considered the trial by fire, the last measurement and confirmation that my secret life of letters has a chance of not being so secret forever. Can I in the midst of a full working month, with a serious family holiday in the mix to boot, produce 50k+ of a manuscript? If I can pull that off, if I can make it through the demands of that challenge, with mondo-housecleaning to do and turkey, gravy and stuffing coming out of my ears, well then, the last excuse is laid to rest. Nothing this side of true physical or psychological disaster should stop me from writing novel-length manuscripts. It is something I will know in my bones and baring said disasters if I do not pursue it, it is because I am not a writer at heart.

Some may argue that whether or not I’m a writer is not subject to such subjective measurements, that it is something one intrinsically is and knows they are. I suppose, from a certain perspective that is true. Even if I do not produce novel length manuscripts, I will continue to write in my journals, editorialize in my secret blogs, write background material for my fairy-milieu and maintain my creative responses at HOL and by extension fan-fiction in JKR’s world, or JRRT’s, or GL’s. That however, to me, is not the same as the ambition to write original novel-length stories. I argue that it is a different breed of hound altogether and I need to know, must know, within and for myself if that dog will hunt or not. If I have tested myself most thoroughly then I can either without regret lay the ambition to rest or pursue it with a vengeance.

Tally-ho!

Originally posted in The Salamander’s Quill 1.0 now deleted.

Well, I made it to my personal JulNoWriMo goal of 62,174 words and I’m pretty pleased. No, I’m bloody amazed and giddy and so, so very happy. Not only does it bring the present manuscript grand total to 74,489, but it represents a serious milestone for me. I know know…KNOW…I can. Armed with that undeniable knowledge, I can’t say can’t anymore.

I know a lot of folk are relieved when they reach the 50k mark, proud of their achievement for sure, but happy nonetheless the pressure is off. I know this because I’ve been checking out their blogs XD , but for me reaching my goal simply inspires me to keep on writing, not necessarily more, but to pursue the story to its end. Rather than relief then, I’m stoked and feel a giddy eagerness and look forward to continuing on, further developing my stories, my characters and myself.

The whole WriMo experience was really a self-imposed test to see if I could produce enough, get involved strongly enough, stay disciplined enough to write a substantial manuscript. I’ll not call it a novel as it’s far from done. Because of that however, I’ve signed up for the AugNoWriMo so I can do just that. At a rough guess, I’m going to say I need another 20 to 25k to finish the manuscript? It think however, I’m going to commit to 50k more. Like I said, The Kevodran will be done in half as many words, but for the remainder I’ll get Three Moon-Maidens of the shelf and continue with that manuscript to finish out the 50k.

I suppose this will be another self-imposed test in the sense that with school starting right in the middle of the month, I’ll have had two weeks of fairly uninterrupted writing time, honey-dos and leaky koi pond aside, to finish The Kevodran (fingers crossed). The last 25k, however, will have to be accomplished with the pressure of school dominating my time. Can I handle that 1613 word-a-day minimum and be a good husband, do my job, handle the commute,  practice my pipes, walk the dogs, have Quiet Time and get some sleep?

I guess, I’ll see.

Originally posted in The Salamander’s Quill 1.0 now deleted.

Before I begin my writing sessions for today, I thought I’d warm-up my fingers and de-fog my 5:30 am mind with a blog-entry/note on my routine that others may find interesting or at least comparative. What follows is a somewhat typical day. I was behind where I wanted to be goal wise in the number of words written.  I wanted 3k a day but was down by about 5.5k altogether. This is doable in a day for most, especially some of you amazing word factories who can really crank out the words. For me, it was a challenge because of the way I write. I am a more deliberate writer that most. I have a hard time simply writing as much as possible for volume’s sake. I can’t work that way as it’s too far beyond my comfort level for many reasons.

First, I feel that if I pay as much attention as I can to grammar, punctuation and usage while I compose, the job of revision and editing is then made that much easier. Don’t get me wrong, I am charging through, but old habits, especially the good ones, die hard and this is one I don’t want to lose.

Second, I have habit of developing background materials, my blessing or my bane either one. A thorough and complete background on a character, place, organization, culture or item makes it that much easier for me to compose. I feel I write my stories more quickly and confidently with a well developed background to support it. Now, what is ironic about this is that I’m probably writing just as many words when I pause to develop background material as I would simply powering on and later making all kinds of logic corrections and additions later on. It is also true that I am making changes as I compose that sometimes render my background material moot, but like I said, it’s all about comfort level.

Third, I do re-read and revise. I don’t do anything major, but repeated words or logic problems are like tiny burs under the saddle of my writing horse. They’re no real big deal, but they worry me nonetheless. I’ll move a sentence, or if it’s a major problem and rather prickly, I’ll simply rewrite the whole passage. I won’t erase so much as strike-out text to keep the numbers accurate. I know I’m going to have a major re-write session when I’m done with the first draft in which I start at the beginning and revise the whole shebang to catch such problems, but, like I insinuated before: a ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure in terms of time and makes my writing sessions more enjoyable.

What follows is a timeline of my day yesterday. It isn’t necessarily typical as it’s a summer writing day while on vacation and I was desperate to get my numbers back, but it is what I consider for me to be a Zen-like “good writing day.” Maybe some of  you will see yourselves in it, others will realize there is no “perfect” way and still others will have their own writing routines affirmed—“I like my way better! This guy is crazy!”

05:55 – Rise a little late; start coffee; feed dogs and cats; clean cat-shit 😦 ; check emails; check forums; shop Pipers’ Dojo and Acheltibuie Bagpipe specialists; grab coffee; let dogs out.

06:49 – Writing Session One: 531 words

07:31 – Coffee warm up; stretch (rather drowsy); check out Rosie O’Grady’s Highlanders site as promised

07:52 – Writing Session Two: 638 words + research on birth-defects and genetics

09:05 – Wife is up :-); coffee break with her; discuss birth-defects (she is a nurse-practitioner); visit Jake Powning, sword-smith’s site for research; text exchange with my brother

09:53 – Writing Session Three: 516 words

11:05 – Early lunch; phone conversation with Lexie

11:46 – Writing Session Four: 408 words; I’m fighting the urge to take a nap

12:37 – Give up for a bit and take a reading break; make a trip to store for groceries; make smoothies; clean-up kitchen

14:09 – Writing Session Five: 1,954 words; high-five myself

17:05 – Trip to store with my wife; prep dinner; make appetizers

17:40 – Writing Session Six: 375 words

18:07 – Dinner; watch Torchwood with the wife; clean kitchen; play with the dogs; prep for bed (comfort)

20:40 – Bagpipe Practice; check emails

21:42 – Writing Session Seven: 801 words

22:40 – Crash

By the end of the day, I was seriously tiered, for as most of you know, writing is hard work, especially when you try to add “living life” to the mix. For those of you doing the math, you probably noted I’m still a bit down on my goals by 777 words. Today’s goal therefore is 3777, and I’m off to see if I can have another good writing day.

Originally posted in the now deleted “Marchers of Khaldenthea” blog and The Salamander’s Quill 1.0

I got too it and just wrote until things started to make sense and did 2,417 words on “The Kevodran.” It’s still nearly 2708 words behind schedule, but if I stay on target from here on out at 2000 a day, plus say 200 more, I’ll make the JulNoWriMo goal of 50k+. I’ll pat myself on the back having confirmed I can stay with one subject and crank out that many manuscript words.

I need to tighten up the writing routine though. If I don’t, more interruptions will intrude: birthdays, leaky ponds, etc. All of these things are legitimate concerns and need my attention, but so does my writing. Too long I’ve allowed others to dictate my writing routines and habits and as a result I have none. I have nothing but the hunger to want to do it and the guilt for failing. Case in point, I signed up for the AugNoWriMo. I have only two weeks in August and that is putting it nicely as I’ve got to go out to school and work during those last two weeks. If I don’t have a tight strict writing schedule, the school year will start and all my efforts will have gone to waste as academic demands once again eclipses my literary dreams. If I can finish convincing myself that I can sit and crank out 2000 in three hours, I might be able to carry on after August 16th. The sitting alone part in the quiet just me and the ‘puter’s blank page is no problem; it’s not answering the tiny distractions that bug and juggling the big distractions I can’t avoid (job, home, family and other passions) that robs my writing.

13-days and counting to build a fortress that will protect this vulnerable habit from the howling horde of high school don’t-give-a-shits (both student and staff) that will kill it. I’m planting my flag, here and now! I must write. If I cannot write in a significant way, I’ll have to learn to live without doing it. I cannot daily witness the love of my life, my most beautiful muse taken from me by barbarians. Better to move on and give it up than to go insane with frustration and have my dreams abused for yet another year.

Originally posted in the now deleted “Marchers of Khaldenthea” blog and The Salamander’s Quill 1.0